Thursday, April 29, 2010

Changes

Over the course of the last year, the changes in my life have forced a great deal of introspection-some for good, some for ill, but at least the "ill" parts have helped me to realize what I should be working on in terms of character and self-love.

The process of becoming a fiancĂ© and soon, a wife, is something I might have ignored under different circumstances (I'll touch more on that later). Thankfully, I've had a long engagement that has helped me face the challenges and feelings associated with closing the door on one chapter of my life and opening the next; simultaneously accepting the shift in my identity to "wife" and remaining the person I am. It has also allowed me to deal with some past baggage and bring to the surface some things I am still struggling with - things that we struggle with as a couple. By no means am I suggesting that every woman who gets married should feel this way or deal with this set of feelings. On the contrary, I firmly believe that had Big Spoon not suggested that I go to Engaged Nashville, I might not have become aware of Unabridged Bride or The Conscious Bride. I wouldn't have met my new friend Krista or been connected with so many other wonderful ladies. I have Big Spoon to thank for that, among many other things. 

I believe that being in a relationship with Big Spoon has helped me to become a much better version of myself - a version of myself I always wanted to be, but needed this piece of my life's puzzle to finally get there. I have more motivation now and the stablizing effect of our relationship has done good things in many areas in my life (just ask my creative director).

I was a whole person when I met Big Spoon and that makes a huge difference to me. Had we met five years ago, I might not have been ready for a relationship this serious. I just wanted to take a moment to remind myself to be thankful for the process, for our relationship and for the experiences I had before I got to ... well, today.

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