3 Days

IT'S ALMOST HERE! This is my last day at work before the big day.

The in-laws arrived safely last night and we enjoyed dinner together at Olive Garden. Both Big Spoon and I are working today while the parents are ironing our linens, bless their hearts. We will be picking up tuxedos tonight for everyone in our wedding party as well as getting those last minute details completed (consisting of burning a music back-up disc and packing our overnight hotel stay bags).

Last night, I asked for an emotional check-in. Big Spoon revealed that he is feeling nervous, but looking forward to life after wedding, when my attention isn't so focused on ONE DAY. So am I, darling! Oh, I cannot wait to put this in my rear view and move on with our life together.

I'm not saying that he journey hasn't been fun or enjoyable ... it's just been stressful and consuming at the same time. Weddings just are. Big Spoon mused that it has certainly been a valuable growth process for me, but I think there's more to it than that. Our relationship has grown throughout this process, too, and by being with Big Spoon, I've learned to become a better version of myself. The "self" that I've been striving to be for many years. As cliché as it sounds, he's my missing puzzle piece and brings out the very best in me.

4 Days

I finished my vows yesterday and edited them this morning. As terrifying as it is to read them aloud in front of 100 people, I know that the declaration I have written is from my heart (I cry every time I read it) and something I want Big Spoon to hear.

There is so much more I want to say, so I'm going to put it in a wedding day card.

The decorations are packed ... we've only to enjoy and celebrate now. The relief of it is ... wonderful. Knowing that I have nothing else to do but sit back and enjoy the next 4 days is fabulous! Big Spoon's parents arrive today and I have a day of pampering to look forward to on Friday.

Hope you all have a great week and congratulations to our readers who are getting married this weekend!

5 Days

I'm at home sick today and while making my lunch, I thought I would talk about this last week before the wedding.

I feel ... weird.

I don't know how to explain it. Obviously, I want the wedding day to hurry up and get here, but I want it to slow down too. I want more time to write my vows and I want my nails to stop breaking. I want more time to spend with Big Spoon this week and I want to know what he's thinking/feeling.

We're both so busy. So, so busy and I finally managed to make myself sick with stress. 

On the positive side, I feel really great about our wedding. With everything completed, I can finally see how it will all come together and I'm proud of mine and Big Spoon's efforts in planning our wedding day. It's been a roller coaster, sure, but I'm glad he was along for the ride and taking an active role in the decision making process. I love him for it.

I'm feeling a little disconnected with my family, however. I haven't seen my sisters/bridesmaids since my bridal shower in August. They couldn't make it to my Bachelorette Brunch and I guess with creating a new family, there is a certain amount of falling away from one's own to make way for the new.

I feel like Big Spoon and I have already done that, to an extent. We have started a little family that consists of me, him and our two baby cats. Our home feels like home. He feels like home. I fully anticipate feeling different after the wedding ... feeling more connected after we say our vows and promises.

Happy Wedding Week! 6 more days!

Happy wedding week to us! Big Spoon is home and I'm so happy to have him back! We're both very sleep deprived at this point and I didn't get nearly enough done while he was gone.

I haven't written my vows.

The decorations aren't organized & the "reserved" seating signs aren't "ribboned."

The house isn't clean.

I'm stressing out and I hate it. I shouldn't be stressed right now, but there is tons still to do before his parents arrive on Wednesday.

::sigh::

On a brighter note, I had a fabulous bachelorette brunch on Sunday afternoon. Six wonderful girlfriends showed up to celebrate with me and my BFF from High School came in from Knoxville to spend the night Saturday night. It was a very special weekend.

This is most likely my last post before the big day.

Dressed to the 9s

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I've been away at my annual conference, and it's been a particularly rough one for me this year because I'm branching out into a whole new line of work that I've never done before and that's insanely technically complex. It doesn't help that the person who was helping me out and training me moved away a few months ago...and left work undone that I was counting on. Now I'm flying by the seat of my pants and hoping it works out.

But I wouldn't be able to been able to get out for this conference without Little Spoon's help. She packed my bag for the conference, making sure I was dressed nicely, had all my toiletries, and got me some snacks so that I could have cheap but reasonably healthy meals instead of having to eat out all the time that I'm here. I know that she sometimes feels like she doesn't do enough to help me out. But she's been a huge help to me in laying the foundation for me going here, and she's been a sympathetic ear when I've had things go wrong (e.g., losing my notebook with all of my notes of cool ideas, finding out I need to do even more analyses to complete my posters).

Thank you, Little Spoon, for helping me get through this conference. I'm not sure I could do it without out, and I look forward to being back in your arms, helping us surge through the remainder of our wedding preparation.